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The All Fat Guy Baseball Team

The All Fat Guy Baseball Team

These are all fat baseball players. The only criteria for this list is you have to be a current MLB player or have played in the past ten years, and you have to be legit fat. No guys that are just "big boned," I am talking guys who one of the first thoughts in your mind is, "Man, that dude is fat."

SP-Sir Sidney Ponson-"Fat Sidney" as he is affectionately known also has a great temperament. He was knighted in Aruba and then punched a judge and is no longer welcome. Also will be featured on our "All Good Guy" jersey list.


SP-David Wells. Boomer is listed at 250 lbs and that is just a blatant lie.


RP-Rich "El Guapo" Garces. So so fat.



RP-Antonio Alfonseca. Even deducting the weight for his sixth finger he still is a fat body.


CP-Bobby Jenks. Ozzie Guillen once signaled to the bullpen for the wide guy instead of the right hander, that is when you know you are fat.


C-Sal Fasano. I'm glad Sal is still kicking it in the big leagues. What he has done for facial hair also is just tremendous.



1b-Dmitri Young. 3 bills.




2B-Ronnie Belliard. Little fat bodies like this are not meant to be middle infielders.

SS-Mike Aviles. 5'9", 195 lbs. And he is not jacked.


RF-Tony Gwynn. It is a great game when fat guys can be hall of famers.


CF-Andruw Jones. He didn't use to be this fat. He also didn't use to be this bad.


LF-Adam Dunn. The Big Donkey. Real big guy who really prides himself on making good consistent contact at the plate.



Honorable Mention-Bengie Molina, Dmitri Young, Mo Vaughn, Miguel Cabrera, Prince Fielder, CC Sabathia, Jonathan Broxton, Cecil Fielder

Please let me know if you think there is a fat guy I left of the Fattest Baseball Team on Earth.

Bad Jerseys of the 90's Baltimore Edition

These are what I would consider the ten funniest jerseys to see a random person wearing from Baltimore sports teams in the 1990's. This is completely biased on what I would think would be the funniest to see, but I welcome your suggestions as always. The list is in no particular order. (If only Elvis Grbac had been in Baltimore in the 1990's he would certainly be number one) If anybody owns these jerseys please send the pictures along and you should know I may not wear that jersey but I really respect you for doing it.

1. Albert "Don't Call me Joey" Belle. He really was worth that $65 million deal he got from the Orioles and in general was just a great guy. He also was very nice to kids on Halloween.


2. Jeff Reboulet. You really have to love a man that will go out and sport a jersey of a career utility man who was never really any good at all.


3. Vinny Testaverde. He was old when he started every game at quarterback in the Ravens inaugural season in 1996, now he is just really freaking old.


4. Bam Morris. Cut by the Steelers after getting arrested and promptly spent two years full of suspensions and trouble with the law in Baltimore. You may have seen the story of his life on the big screen, The Longest Yard.


5. Chris Sabo. Nobody wore rec specs with more style than Chris Sabo.


6. Brady Anderson. George Mitchell can consider his report incomplete because Brady Anderson was not listed. He hit 16 home runs in 1995, 50 in 1996, and 18 in 1997. He also had unbelieable sudeburns. And my favorite is that he picks up chicks online and texts them pictures of his abs.



7. Tony Tarasco. Most famous for being the guy that Jeffrey Maier took the ball away from in the 1996 ALCS. Way to make your mark on the league Tony.


8. Roberto Alomar. Role Model.


9. Mike Bordick. The chosen man to take over for Cal Ripken. The team chose the successor to the Iron Man real well and that decision was the first in a long line that led to a decade of being a model franchise. Not.




10. Sir Sidney Ponson. This would have to be size XXXL to be realistic though. And of course you would have to be a drunken jerk.

Top Japanese Baseball Jerseys to Own

These are what I would consider the funniest jerseys to see a random person wearing from a Japanese baseball team. This is completely biased on what I would think would be the funniest to see, but I welcome your suggestions as always. The list is in no particular order. If anybody owns these jerseys please send the pictures along and you should know I may not wear that jersey, but I really respect you for doing it.

1. Tuffy Rhodes. Hit three home runs on Opening Day for the Cubs in 1993, appeared to be the second coming of Andre Dawson in Chicago, and promptly fell off the face of the earth.


2. Benny Agbayani. The Hawaiian Punch. Really had a good fan following in New York. Too bad he was not very good at baseball.


3. Kei Igawa. Remember when he was good? No, you probably don't because that wasn't in America. (And look at that hair)


4. Alex Ochoa. Oh thats where he went.



5. Tony Batista. Just because of that stance.


6. Matt Franco. Poor guy only has 22 career home runs and still gets named in the Mitchell Report.


7. Tsuyoshi Shinjo. If I could see his jersey in Japan I would have a good chance at guessing what color the matching sweatbands would be.


8. Hideki Irabu. Ira-Boo-Ya. What a bust he was. Very mediocre career for the fat pussy toad. He was once trade with Homer Bush for Ruben Rivera, three enormous busts in one trade is pretty impressive. Apparently he loves to get wasted too.




9. Hideo Nomo. Honestly how can you not love Nomo? The tornado really took this country by storm teaching kids all over the nation the worst pitching mechanics known to man kind. Poor guy even got cut by the Royals this spring.