Showing posts with label Philadelphia Teams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Philadelphia Teams. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Lenny Dykstra Is an Idiot
Doing his best Turk Wendell impersonation, Lenny Dykstra walked out of a Manhattan courthouse after agreeing to a settlement with his former accounting firm. Who ever would have guessed that Lenny Dykstra writes a financial advice column for thestreet.com? Not I. For the full story go here.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Playoff Observations
1. Robin Yount still has unreal facial hair.
2. Wrigley Field got a new scoreboard. It looks like its HD too.
3. CC is human.
4. Frank TV somehow, someway, still has not been canceled. I have no idea how.
5. Dick Vitale is not cryogenically frozen from April to October and may be the only person to own Devil Rays season tickets since they came into existence.
6. People still think Steve Bartman sucks.
7. Terry Francona may or may not have a tobacco addiction.
8. Shane Victorino may have surpassed Benny Agbayani and Sid Fernandez as the greatest baseball player to hail from Hawaii.
9. The Brewers actually have three guys, CC Sabathia, Prince Fielder, and Seth McClung who could compete to be on the fattest team in baseball.
10. I think if a turtle could speak it would sound like Tony Gwynn
11. Kosuke Fukudome has the worst swing I have ever seen. I have no idea how he was an all star starter other than different funny ways you can butcher his name.
12. Michael Phelps, the so-called Greatest Olympian Ever is doing ads for Rosetta Stone language tapes now. Clearly hearing him speak it is obvious Phelps is not a scholar and not spending his spare time studying languages. This really proves no one cares about swimming outside of that one week every four years.
13. The Cubs will never ever win
14. The secret to winning playoff series might be Japanese second baseman, Kaz Matsui last year, Akinori Iwamura this year
15. The Rays have a quality assurance coach, that sounds like something an insurance company would have
16. The Rays also have a guy that you might remember from Street Fighter
2. Wrigley Field got a new scoreboard. It looks like its HD too.
3. CC is human.
4. Frank TV somehow, someway, still has not been canceled. I have no idea how.
5. Dick Vitale is not cryogenically frozen from April to October and may be the only person to own Devil Rays season tickets since they came into existence.
6. People still think Steve Bartman sucks.
7. Terry Francona may or may not have a tobacco addiction.
8. Shane Victorino may have surpassed Benny Agbayani and Sid Fernandez as the greatest baseball player to hail from Hawaii.
9. The Brewers actually have three guys, CC Sabathia, Prince Fielder, and Seth McClung who could compete to be on the fattest team in baseball.
10. I think if a turtle could speak it would sound like Tony Gwynn
11. Kosuke Fukudome has the worst swing I have ever seen. I have no idea how he was an all star starter other than different funny ways you can butcher his name.
12. Michael Phelps, the so-called Greatest Olympian Ever is doing ads for Rosetta Stone language tapes now. Clearly hearing him speak it is obvious Phelps is not a scholar and not spending his spare time studying languages. This really proves no one cares about swimming outside of that one week every four years.
13. The Cubs will never ever win
14. The secret to winning playoff series might be Japanese second baseman, Kaz Matsui last year, Akinori Iwamura this year
15. The Rays have a quality assurance coach, that sounds like something an insurance company would have
16. The Rays also have a guy that you might remember from Street Fighter
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Fattest Football Coach
Football could be considered a fat guys sport, but fat coaches, they just don't seem necessary. Below is my list of the fattest football coaches in the country.
Ralph Friedgen. Maryland. I guess his father should be to blame for this for having a name that could easily be shortened to Fridge jinxed him, clearly that is why he is fat.
Mark Mangino. Kansas. Definitley has not seen his weiner in years. Feel free to insert your own mangina joke here because they will all work.
Charlie Weis. Notre Dame. Charlie is so fat and worthless that he tears his ACL and does not really care about getting it fixed because he knows he's fat and won't really need the ability to move well to go about his life.
Phillip Fulmer. Tennessee. When you are a fat guy you really should not be posing at press conferences in postions that make it realistic for someone with too much time to photo shop in a box of crispy creme doughnuts.
Bill Parcells. Miami Dolphins. Mangino minus on ehundred. Still has the fupa. Its like the girl that use to be fat and isn't anymore but still has big boobs.
Andy Reid. Philadelphia Eagles. Andy can't wait to get home and slip into his mumu.
Ralph Friedgen. Maryland. I guess his father should be to blame for this for having a name that could easily be shortened to Fridge jinxed him, clearly that is why he is fat.
Mark Mangino. Kansas. Definitley has not seen his weiner in years. Feel free to insert your own mangina joke here because they will all work.
Charlie Weis. Notre Dame. Charlie is so fat and worthless that he tears his ACL and does not really care about getting it fixed because he knows he's fat and won't really need the ability to move well to go about his life.
Phillip Fulmer. Tennessee. When you are a fat guy you really should not be posing at press conferences in postions that make it realistic for someone with too much time to photo shop in a box of crispy creme doughnuts.
Bill Parcells. Miami Dolphins. Mangino minus on ehundred. Still has the fupa. Its like the girl that use to be fat and isn't anymore but still has big boobs.
Andy Reid. Philadelphia Eagles. Andy can't wait to get home and slip into his mumu.
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